Sunday, July 31, 2011

Allowing wholeness: letting go of eschewing pain

In my spiritual tradition, we practice letting go of energies that no longer serve us, and this 'housecleaning' in my energy system serves me, A LOT.

AND what I have noticed is: for the 'core issues', the deep wounding:
- eschewing the pain, pictures, experiences, energy...
- wanting to turn away and not grok this dark gift, rather just let it go:
this path Does Not Work.
I notice it doesn't make the pain move out easily in my system, or my students systems, ot the folks who come to me to open to healing, either. In general, I notice for our deepest wounds, something else is often needed.

What seems to work, is being present to the brokenness, betrayal... whatever it is
- being present to what happened
- being present to what I thought and felt and made it all mean
- being present to how 'what happened' affected me then and affected me throughout my life to now;
- seeing the players and the game spiritually
- and holding it all, 'being with' myself then and now, and eventually validating and loving it all.

I don't mean spending a lifetime there, or even necessarily reliving it. I do mean not continuing the lifetime habit of running away from the pain/fear/whatever, hoping to bury it so deeply that it can't hurt me anymore. Because I can never run fast enough, and the price I pay for trying is very high!

So, in my tradition we notice the energy comes 'up and out to clear', if we let it. This process can be intense for a while, and happily that intensity ends and the fruit is amazing afterward:
- we need less distraction, obsessions, addictions...
- we can stop running from that old pain/fear/whatever...
- we can Just Be in our self and in our lives, more.
And as our internal expereince changes, our external expereince usually shifts as well.

This excerpt below inspired me to share, it is a wonderful description, IMO, of someone else's process of what I am referring to as allowing wholeness: letting go of eschewing pain. I hope you are blessed.

As Energy Comes Home

Compacted, frozen pain energy is like a baby. As a mother does not address her fussing baby with nondual language, neither do we in the meeting with ourselves. You may know and understand a lot and be conscious, but these energies are not conscious.

You come into direct relationship with them. Direct but gentle, not piercing, not intrusive, not willpowering anything. Asking contracted energy what it needs is a lovely way of acknowledging its presence and becoming intimate with it. Everything that is not at rest wants to be acknowledged, to be received and bathed in gentleness and benevolence.

It calls for a major slowing down, to receive the old, repressed cries of pain that show up now as contractions, as bodily sensations.

The mind is conditioned to want results - the result in this case being the disappearance of the disturbance. It is very, very sweet to bypass this, allowing the body to have what it has for as long as it does. You may walk around for hours with disturbance but you can be nurturing and aware of your precious cargo. Mercy and opening.

As you become more relaxed with meeting energy in yourself, you find a natural extension of this happening with others. Pain energy in another is no different in any way from energy in your own system. It is all the same separated, totally impersonal energy seeking resolution, looking for Home. So you find yourself, if the situation is fitting, in direct, welcoming relationship with these balls of energy in another, bypassing the personality and issue and mechanisms of mind. A catalyst for the dissolution of pain in others, a totally organic movement of Love.

...your heart is awakening. You come to see that You are Home and all is invited and welcomed Here.

- Mags Deane

1 comment:

  1. ha - ran across a relevant quote:

    What cannot be eschew’d must be embrac’d.

    - William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor, 1599